The glory of being freed from myself

My "band of brothers" and I are currently working through Unfashionable as a part of our study. I read the book over the summer, and thought it might be a good book for a group of guys trying to make a difference for Christ in this world. We are nearing its completion, and it has been a blessing to see the Spirit working in our midst on both a group and individual level. One topic I overlooked when I read the book on my own and with the group talked about the freedom we have in Christ. Most times I look at my freedom as solely the freedom from my sin. While this is a truly beautiful and amazing blessing, it is not the only thing I have been set free from. Christ's death and resurrection released me from myself. I am relieved of my desire for individualism: the desire to be left to myself. For most of my life, I thought individualism was a blessing. I spent many nights in college all alone because I thought it was what made me most joyful (Note that time for oneself is sometimes necessary, but it shouldn't be our deepest desire). Only now, do I realize the amount of growth I had available to me through other people. I missed out because I was still a slave to myself.

Over the past few years, God has graciously allowed me to taste the freedom from individualism. My regenerated heart now aches when I am absent from my brothers (and sisters). I get excited about new things I am learning because I know there are people around me to share with. I also get the great (and sometimes uncomfortable) pleasure of letting them speak into my life for both encouragement and reproof. I experienced this truth afresh over the Christmas break and, more recently, in the last week.

While at home I got to talk with one of my spiritual "uncles" (the title I give for the handful of men who have had a significant role in my spiritual development, but not to the level of my father) about my current state of affairs, and what God's plan for me is down the road. Since my current wrestling match with God is over these issues, I wasn't too sure how much I wanted to reveal. Evidently God had already decided to let my "uncle" do some speaking for Him. He spoke challenging and encouraging words directly to the heart my future endeavors. Did he provide a clear-cut answer for which path God wants me on? Actually, my vision is even cloudier than it was before. However, it drove me to the place I continually forget to go: the throne of grace.

The other example came last night after spending most of the day with one of the closest brothers I have in my band. I shared the aforementioned experience with my "uncle," and where I felt it left me. This brother probed more into my thinking and wrestling to get me to be more open (this particular brother has a knack for this). He successfully opened me up like a peanut shell at a baseball game. I didn't necessarily want him to, but I am certain God did. With the information I gave he was able to add wisdom and encouragement to the advice of my "uncle." I didn't leave any better off with him either, but I wasn't by myself. This particular match is still far from over. However, I am learning that tag-team is allowed.