I stole the book Choosing to See from my mother after it was lent to her. (I have given it back to let her finish since) For those who aren't familiar, it the story of Steven Curtis Chapman's wife, Mary Beth. It details her growing pains as well as the recent loss of her daughter during a freak accident in the family's driveway. I am not quite halfway through, and I am eager to finish it once my mom is done first. The book is an honest look into a lifelong wrestling match between God and one of His children.

At one part in the book, Chapman wrote about the struggles of being in the limelight give the popularity of her husband's music. As someone heading into ministry, I often struggle with trying to get my life perfect in order to show everyone around me that I am "qualified." I went everything to appear in order. Then I don't have to worry about any questions or challenges I may have in regards to my calling. To that thought Chapman wrote this,

People need to know that Christian leaders…preachers…whoever, are as cracked and broken as the next person. Maybe more so. Hopefully they are in positions of leadership, though, because they are serious about following Christ, and so people can see that real success in the kingdom of God is not about being strong and looking good and knowing all the right answers. It’s about continually yielding oneself to Jesus and determining to take purposeful steps of obedience, and the ragged reality that it’s all about God and His grace at work in us. ~Mary Beth Chapman Choosing to See pp. 70

Without a doubt, I am cracked and broken. Equally true, the Spirit works in spite of this. God's grace is greater and more powerful than anything I can imagine.